And to address this manly thing. This seems to always be a conversation worthy of a headline or a social media post. For me this comes down to fulfillment of responsibility, and gentle leadership. As men we are often viewed as leaders. To lead gently is not to command. To lead gently is to empower and inspire. This is a much greater task that demands a great deal of empathy and vulnerability. To be strong and to lead in a gentle manner requires a level of connection that takes an investment of time, and takes requires effort. It is very challenging to lead children/ near impossible without connection. Its literally in our biology. Connection is first, it is the thing we most seek. Then all things come after. To think that we can thrive and lead without this is faulty I believe. Adults are just experienced kids. Connection still reigns supreme. Establish this and foster this and you are on the right track. Connection also demands vulnerability, it demands being seen, it demands letting people in. I am not referring to letting people take advantage of you, I am referring to allowing others to know you and experience who you are. If you can find a balance between taking care of your responsibilities and leading in a gentle way, you my friend are behaving in a very real manner. Hence you are a "real" man. Manhood is not about a look, it is not about some false ideal. Manhood is a very real expression of a committed individual to others outside himself. Its a life of service. To lead we must build others up, and this starts at the most basic of needs, the need to connect.