Voice

We all need a place to tell our story. I realize that some people are hesitant to share what is on their mind, for one or many reasons. We all have unique experiences, and we all have unique situations. It was crystal clear to me as soon as I became a father, that I had a whole lot to learn. I knew that I could offer my experience up, as it comes along, in hopes that it would help other dad’s find some clarity. For the past 10 months, I have been doing this. I will continue to do this throughout my life in hopes of creating a database for dads. An oasis of experience to pull from. To have a newborn child in your hands, and not know what to do is a intimidating place to be. Through sharing my stories, and the help of some other fathers this will happen.

This is that place. This place, this little corner of the web is here to be a platform for dads to have a voice. This is a place to share your story, to help other dads find some guidance in a world that doesn’t seem to support this on the daily. I have had some people reach out to me and ask to share. I can’t tell you how excited this makes me. I have learned from each of them, and am forever grateful for their entries. I just got off the phone with my father today, and he was talking about getting me some blog entries from fathers that he knows. Incredible!

If you have a story. Reach out. All of our experiences as fathers are helpful. This is not a place for right and wrong. This is a community for the betterment of all of us. My contributions are limited to a very small human. I would love to know more about 2 year olds, and 10 year olds. I am headed in that direction and have nothing to pull from. Thanks in advance for your words. Cheers to being a dad!

2 years later commentary

I have another daughter and have a heap more experiences. The one constant in this journey is the learning. Each day is full of growth for my girls, and full of learning for me. Potty Training, moving bedtimes, appropriate conversation about a slew of things, discipline, and the list goes on and on. The struggles and the hurdles in this journey are bountiful, and so it the availability of help. You just have to look for it.

This year is going to be a year of expansion around here. I am firing up a podcast that is going to be Awesome. The goal here is exposure to people that are doing amazing things in their parenting journeys. The goal is to hear stories of struggle and successes so that we can form some context for the things that happen in our own lives. Through Instagram we have crowdsourced some questions that dads have to dads all around the world and the response has been Amazing. Could you imagine asking your pressing question and getting 50+ answers from dads all over the world? It happened, and it will happen again. This community is wealth because you make it that way. We are better because you share.

As men, and as fathers I believe it very important that we tell our stories, and we let others know that we are available. More often than not candid humility is necessary, and acceptance that people all have different ways of doing things is pretty paramount as well. You could imagine that if you grew up in a different culture half way around the world, and you had never travelled from your home country, that you would have a different belief system, different ways of parenting, different interests, and different goals. Does this make you wrong? I would say no, I would say it makes you different, and all together the exact same. It seems that we live in this world where people are trying to find a reason to be offended, instead of a world where people are seeking common ground. Well I have some pretty basic news for you. Dads are dads any way you slice it. We all share in the joy and the struggle. And here, we have a United Voice.

Setting aside differences in the name of getting better is high on my priority list for this place. Our kids are in desperate need for us as men to be focused on improving ourselves, and thriving in our own life. This is no easy feat, and we all need some coaching along the way. I have been very fortunate to converse with dads all over the world in the past few years and we really do share the same experiences. Now our lives look different to the eye, sometimes translation has been needed, but our concern for our children, and the love and duty we feel. These are the same.

If you are out there reading this and you have a story to tell, I am interested. I have a form on my homepage that you can fill out and get this ball rolling. I would love to use this platform to share your story as well, in the name of betterment for all of us. I am not interested in only stories of successes, its important for us to talk about the real, and the gritty stuff too.

Our voices are such a gift. I think we can all relate to using it in less than ideal ways such as yelling at our kids, or cursing someone or something. But here, we have an opportunity to use our voices as shining beacons in the night for other fathers that may be lost. And there are plenty of them. I have felt lost, like I didn't have the information I needed at least a million times it seems in raising our two girls, and the oldest is still working on turning 4. I would love to hear some struggles and some strategies from fathers of 5 and 8 and 11 year olds, because thats coming for me and I have no idea.

Where are you in this world? How old are your kids? Whats your greatest struggle? What puzzles you? What are your proudest moments of fatherhood? Let me know.